Note to Self

8 Types of Women you should know about

Christien Paul — Tue, 10 May 2011 00:47:21 +0000

So I’ve been dating, learning, observing, reading, and talking to people and here’s a new concept I thought I’d archive in the blog. Apparently, when it comes to attracting women, you better be sure you know who you are talking to, because if you do the opposite for her type… you’ll strike out every time.

Now personally I think there may be some half-breeds in there but the 8 basic types are pretty congruent with what I feel would be common-sense. Oh, don’t mind the image to the right… I was scouring the web for an image I could use as a thumbnail for this post and well… this one was just too funny not to share (types of female behinds) :p

Ok, back to the 8 types of women… The eight types are listed below with their respective profile attributes broken down into what I’ll call the 3 metrics of a woman’s type.

Relationship: this refers to what a woman wants in a relationship – is she looking for someone to stay at home with and watch a movie (cuddling) or get out and live life to the fullest with a guy that will show her the coolest spots in town (adventure).

Time-line: this refers to what a woman is attracted to – is she into alpha males (cocky) or looking for a down-to-earth guy (romantic). Women who want alpha males generally shop around a lot when dating in hopes to find the coolest/badest man in town. Romantic men tend to be more reserved, even shy and perhaps quiet.

Sex-line: this refers to what makes a woman want sex – is she insecure and need to be made to feel safe (make safe) or is she the kind of girl that needs a man who can be aggressive and turn her on (turn-on).

Type	Relationship	Time-Line	Sex-Line
Playette	cuddling	cocky	make safe
Social Butterfly	cuddling	cocky	turn-on
Hopeful Romantic	cuddling	romantic	make safe
Cinderella	cuddling	romantic	turn-on
Your Private Dancer	adventure	cocky	make safe
Seductress	adventure	cocky	turn-on
Connoisseur	adventure	romantic	make safe
Modern Woman	adventure	romantic	turn-on

So what’s next? How do you identify a woman’s type… right. There are 3 rather innocent questions that you can ask to help identify a woman’s type. Each answer will help identify all three of her preferences;

1) What gives you the most fulfillment in life?

If she says something like travel, she’s clearly looking for an adventure, if she says something like helping others… chances are she’s a home-body looking to cuddle.

2) What is the one thing you would need if trapped on a deserted island?

If she says something like “a mirror” to be rescued, she’s not down with adventure. If she says “a hamek so that I can lay on the beach” she’s pretty confident and doesn’t need to be made to feel safe.

3) What emotions will you experience when you achieve your most far-reaching goal?

If she says “relieved” then she probably needs to feel safe… if she says “the desire for more” then she’s clearly someone who gets turned-on.

What do you think? Is this accurate? Dead wrong? I have to admit that I’m filling in some of the blanks I refused to pay for when I found this concept. I happen to click on an ad off Facebook that was advertising “Pandora’s Box by Vin Dicarlo” If you know it, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

The no mercy rule

Christien Paul — Fri, 06 May 2011 21:35:35 +0000

So I’m heading to kitchener this weekend for another tournament. The beauty about this tournament is that I’m the only one from my dojo who is going, so there will be no hard feelings over fighting a friend.

Another perk is that there is no weight class, so I don’t need to worry about cutting weight… and last but not least, it’s kumite karate which is strictly punch kick… no take downs!

As you may or may not know, I’m best on my feet so this is all good news to me. Now that being said, what should I focus on instead? Thinking back to my last fight, my mindset was weak… I felt no urge to persevere for I felt I’d be standing in the way of my training partner and I was on hair pills which crippled my ego (sometimes a good thing).

Now the game in this tournament is to be the first to score 5 p0ints… while reading the rules I took note of this footnote; no mercy rule. I ask the organizers what that meant and the responses was “if someone is getting creamed the fight will be stopped… so if one competitor has say 3 points and his opponent has no points, the referee may call it “no contest” or “no mercy”.

Interesting… this makes me think that my focus leading up to the event should be that mind-set “no mercy”… just cream the guy but don’t get disqualified. Play by the rules and commit to every step of the way. No mercy, not even for me. Having this mindset is the only way my spirit will come through… I’ve got to open the channel and not hesitate… hesitation kills the spirit.

Not Happy? Remind Yourself of Your Ideal Day.

Christien Paul — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 03:34:40 +0000

I’m noticing behavioural changes in my day to day habits. I’m beginning to pick up on a pattern of “highs” and “lows”. Sometimes I say to myself “that’s how I like it, life is a roller coaster baby yeah yeah.” and then the bigger me comes in and says “stress will kill ya kiddo, relax and hold it steady, live longer.”

I think highs and lows are good if you can remain calm, cool and collected throughout them. If you bounce up like a yo-yo every time your work load is at a high and a low, you’re going to get paralyzed from truly enjoying your life. I think a little taste of bliss each day is better than dry spell getting flooded over and over again.

As of late I’ve noticed that I’ve been a lot messier in the office, the kitchen, the bathroom, the bedroom, etc. A few months earlier everything was spic and span and I felt great. I quit smoking, I trained every day, I ate right, I was balanced between work and friends.

Here and now, I realize that I need to remind myself of what I was doing then because clearly I’m not doing the same thing now. I suppose the difference is that now I am not nourishing my soul but rather suffocating it. I need to plug-in and “recharge” my spirit. To do so I need to get back on track. I thought my best foot forward would be to outline the usual day I had while “happy” and the usual day i had while “grumpy”;

IN GOOD SPIRITS

Day Time: Wake Up, EAT BREAKFAST, Check Email, Produce for clients, WORKOUT, Shower, EAT LUNCH, Take Dog for a Walk, Produce for Clients.

Night Time: Go out with friends, Have Dinner, Watch a movie or Make Music, Go to sleep

IN BAD SPIRITS

Day Time: Wake Up, Check Email, Have Coffee/Cigarette, Surf the Internet, Work on Personal Projects, Produce for Clients, Have Another Cigarette/Coffee

Night Time: Have Dinner (really breakfast), Surf the Internet, Produce for Clients, Take Dog for a Walk, Produce for Clients, EAT LUNCH, Go to Sleep, EAT Dinner, Go Back to Sleep.

Yikes! I don’t ever want to lose that “good spirit” so I better make note of these differences in behaviour/habits and do what works and avoid what doesn’t. Hopefully this post will have carved this epiphany into my skull.

Until next time, remind yourself of your ideal day.

What does it mean to be humble?

Christien Paul — Tue, 12 Apr 2011 04:57:15 +0000

I think I finally figured it out. To be humble is to “under-promise” and “over-deliver”. You see if you want to make them come back for more you better not get their hopes up. It’s a tricky thing… you think confidence, that’s what attracts people and that may be true, but going overboard and”bragging” too much can dig you right into the grave.

It took me a while to put “under-promise” and “over-deliver” into practice with clients but now I see how that applies to people in general. My Sensei always says “Be a man of your word. Consider everything you say to be a promise and never make promises you can’t keep.” Here is an example of how being humble helps manage expectations;

Scenario 1: “Yeah sure I’ll pick you up, I’ll be there by 2pm”… later on you show up at 3:45pm. You’ve just let them down, you got their hopes up… you didn’t give yourself enough time to get there… you were over-confident.

Scenario 2: “Yeah sure I’ll pick you up, I’ll be there by 4pm”… later on you show up at 3:45pm. BONUS!!! You exceeded their expectations! You were humble and gave yourself more than enough time to make it happen.

If you do this with everything you say you’ll do it’ll pay off in dividends. You won’t feel pressured, they won’t get their hopes up, everyone goes home happy and wanting more. That’s what it means to be humble, at least in my books.

Are you dating a jerk?

Christien Paul — Thu, 07 Apr 2011 18:15:52 +0000

So I came across this great article while surfing the net and thought I’d share with all of you. As you know, I can be a helpless romantic and I’ve recently had a fallout with someone I thought was going to last. Evidently, she was a jerk

Here is an excerpt from the article with a link to read more;

“Once one disappointment blemishes the relationship, the narcissist can never retrieve the fantasy feeling of true love.”

Lisa Earle McLeod, author of Forget Perfect says, “Jerkiness is related to narcissism. A jerk usually has a long history of failed relationships, and they’ll always tell you why it was the other person’s fault. The relationship gets really serious really fast, they get infatuated, but the second the jerk finds out that you’re not perfect and you no longer see them as perfect, they become demanding and critical.”

According to Van Epp, there are five universal human bonding dynamics: Know, trust, rely, commit and sex. He suggests that “you should never go farther in one bonding dynamic than you have gone in the previous.”

This all brings me back to one of my all-time favourite quotes again; “judge love not by the garden but by the gardeners” – Rhumi

Read the original article

Home Made Caesar Dressing

Christien Paul — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 23:26:56 +0000

Ok, I got the duty of making tonight’s Caesar dressing and thought I’d post it here as a means of engraving it in my mind.

You see, this isn’t the first time I’ve had to make the “family recipe” and I keep forgetting all the ingredients.

In my family we tend to eye-ball everything or follow the nose, so here goes, try out your own ratios;

1 egg yolk
2 tablespoons dijon mustard
A squirt or two of anchovy paste
tarragon vinegar & olive oil (half & half)
4 crushed garlic cloves
A touch of lemon juice
A touch of tarragon spice (optional)

Now believe it or not I drank this caesar dressing before competing in a sport jiu jitsu tournament. For whatever reason (I think it’s the garlic) I get revved up and hyperactive after eating this stuff.

Enjoy

The Side Effects of Drugs

Christien Paul — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 05:52:43 +0000

Many of us will eventually lose some hair. Some of us can sport it better than others but all in all, it’s something we’d all like to control. I’m writing this post to thwart others from trying to control it. If you or a friend use Propecia, read this post;

On the night of my last tournament, I came to realize that I lost my drive… I was feeling pretty careless, low on strength, it’s like I couldn’t ramp up to full tilt (that’s what I say when i mean pump up some adrenaline).

I mentioned this to my mother whom is a physiatrist and she suggested i get some blood work done to see if Propecia (a pill that stops hair loss) had done any damage to my hormones. She then asked if my doctor had gotten blood work from me before starting the prescription… ugh, no.

“So, you’re telling me that your doctor put you on something that suppresses your testosterone and he didn’t even get a sample count of testosterone to serve as a reference for future comparison? How is he suppose to assure everything is safe? Get a new doctor!”

So here I was wondering if perhaps she was onto something… time for Google; propecia side effects, propecia withdrawal, propecia symptoms, etc. I found this great text interview to assess myself on this messageboard that has canvased thousands of men who have sadly been permanently affected after prolonged use; http://www.propeciahelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=2588

It had already been filled out by a guy my age just a little bit taller and heavier. When I filled out this interview sheet I came up with all the same answers as another guy my age who was on it for more than 5 years (since age 22).

1) How did you find this forum?

Searching Internet for propecia problems.

2) What is your current age, height, weight?

27/176cm/160lbs

3) Do you exercise regularly? If so, what type of exercise?

Martial Arts – 2 to 3 times per week

4) What type of diet do you eat (vegetarian, meat eater, raw, fast-food/organic healthy)?

A bit of everything

5) Why did you take Finasteride (hair loss, BPH, other)?

Hair loss

6) For how long did you take Finasteride (weeks/months/years)?

2 months

7) How old were you when you started Finasteride?

How old were you when you quit?

9) How did you quit (cold turkey or taper off)?

Cold Turkey

10) What type of Finasteride did you use – Propecia, Proscar, Fincar or other generic?

Propecia

11) What dose did you take (eg. 1 mg/day, 1 mg every other day etc.)?

1 mg/day

12) How long into your use of Finasteride did you notice the onset of side effects?

4 weeks

13) What side effects did you experience while on the drug that have yet to resolve since discontinuation?
ED and very slight gynecomastia
Put an X beside all that apply:

Sexual
[ ] Loss of Libido / Sex Drive
[ ] Erectile Dysfunction
[ ] Complete Impotence
[x] Loss of Morning Erections
[x] Loss of Spontaneous Erections
[x] Loss of Nocturnal Erections
[x] Watery Ejaculate
[ ] Reduced Ejaculate
[ ] Inability to Ejaculate / Orgasm
[ ] Reduced Sperm Count / Motility

Mental
[ ] Emotional Blunting / Emotionally Flat
[x] Difficulty Focusing / Concentrating
[ ] Confusion
[x] Memory Loss / Forgetfullness
[x] Stumbling over Words / Losing Train of Thought
[ ] Slurring of Speech
[x] Lack of Motivation / Feeling Passive / Complacency
[x] Extreme Anxiety / Panic Attacks
[x] Depression / Melancholy

Physical
[ ] Penile Tissue Changes (narrowing, shrinkage, wrinkled)
[ ] Penis curvature / rotation on axis
[ ] Testicular Pain
[ ] Testicular Shrinkage / Loss of Fullness
[ ] Genital numbness / sensitivity decrease
[ ] Weight Gain
[ ] Gynecomastia (male breasts)
[ ] Muscle Wastage
[ ] Muscle Weakness
[ ] Joint Pain
[ ] Dry / Dark Circles under eyes

Misc
[ ] Prostate pain
[ ] Persistent Fatigue / Exhaustion
[ ] Stomach Pains / Digestion Problems
[ ] Constipation / “Poo Pellets”
[ ] Vision – Acuity Decrease / Blurriness
[ ] Increased hair loss
[ ] Frequent urination
[ ] Lowered body temperature

[ ] Other (please explain)

14) What (if any) treatments have you undertaken to recover from your side effects since discontinuation of the drug?

No treatments… I’m feeling like myself more and more I was on it for 8 weeks and have currently been off it for nearly 2 weeks.

15) If you have pre or post-Finasteride bloodtests, what hormonal changes have you encountered since discontinuing the drug (pls post your test results in the “Blood Tests” section and link to them in your post)?

NEVER GOT BLOOD WORK!!!

16) Anything not listed in the above questions you’d like to share about your experience with Finasteride?

Doctors should be ordered to get blood work before being able to write a prescription for it.

17) Tell us your story, in your own words, about your Finasteride usage and side effects experienced while on/off the drug.

I’ve only taken it for 2 months and didn’t really clue into its side-effects until the eighth week. Looking back on it, my family says they noticed behavioural changes but thought that may be the result of having quit smoking cigarettes. I really put my hormones through the ringer by quitting an addiction and starting propecia. I actually felt like propecia was helping with the cravings and stress levels… but really it was just sedating me… I didn’t have the balls to truly get a grip on anything. I lost my drive… i lost my motivation. I’d rather be bald with balls than fabio without them.

Milton Jiu Jitsu Tournament – Thoughts and Feelings

Christien Paul — Mon, 21 Feb 2011 20:10:41 +0000

This tournament was the first one I’ve been to where fighters fought outside of the ring… yeah like in the crowd with all of their friends jumping in… it was your classic bar brawl. The culprit who started the fight was disqualified from the tournament for excessive force. I could see it coming, before his fight began, he had this look on his face like he wanted to kill his opponent. Nostrils flaring, fists clenched, eyes not blinking, and the guy was breathing like a mule in heat.

His opponent punched him square in the nose which is an illegal target in our sport. Naturally, this hooligan blew up and just started lacing into this poor guy who was scared shitless with a flurry of full contact punches. The referee was disgusted (also hosting the tournament) and disqualified him from the tournament and banned him from the World Kobudo Federation tournaments.

As if that wasn’t enough… this nut started mouthing off to the referee at which point the victim’s friend shouted out “get the fuck out of here”. Judging by this guy’s reaction… I wouldn’t be surprised if he was on steroids… in fact everyone from his school looked like killers. What did he do?? He said “Whachu gonna do bout it bitch?” he then throws his gloves off and chargers for his opponent’s friend with the big mouth. What a riot!!! All the coaches jumped in to split them up and kindly asked them to leave. But sure enough, on their way out, before they made it to the door, they broke out into a bare knuckle fight in the midst of the crowd that was watching the other fights… the ones in the ring.

I wasn’t very excited for this tournament. As of late, I have been lucky to get 1 or 2 hours in a week to train because it’s high season in my line of work having Canadian Music Week right around the corner. Fact of the matter is, my first fight was against one of my very own training partners from the dojo and I had a feeling we’d be fighting for the finals but not the qualifier. Generally speaking organizers try not to make students of the same martial arts school fight each other. He was 18 years old, pursuing this professionally and training up to 4 hours a day for it. That’s not even the worst of it, the list goes on.

What went wrong?

I forgot all my protective equipment at home
They merged weight categories (180 lbs and under – I weighed in at 155 lbs)
My first fight wasn’t suppose to be my fight (someone else has the name Christian)
I waited 4 hours with an empty stomach for my first match
My Sensei left before I even got to fight (family duties)

Check the video above for my vlog and the list of related posts below for the fight footage.

MJJ Tournament: Fight 1

Christien Paul — Mon, 21 Feb 2011 20:08:49 +0000

This was my first fight in the tournament against my own friend. Meet Mateja, a brother from the dojo and the guy I car pooled with :p

We were hoping to fight in different divisions but they merged weight categories. Mateja is 18 years old and on route to professional mma. He claims to train up to 4 hours per day; 1 hour of weights at lunch, 1 hour with his brother after school and then a 1 to 2 hour class at the dojo. Wow. I can’t say that my heart was as devoted as his. At least we were both guaranteed another fight. There were 9 fighters in our division and it was tiered for a double elimination (lose 2 fights and you’re out).

To fight for first place in the tournament you needed to win your first two fights. Then you would have a third fight for first place.

If you won one and lost one, you got a 3rd fight for third place. If you lost your first two fights you were out of the tournament.

Here’s what’s funny, I wasn’t even suppose to fight him. There was another contender named Christian who was around when they called the names to the ring. We’d have likely had this fight in the finals had I not walked into the ring instead of the other Christian.

To my credit Mateja (who won 1st) said that I was the most difficult fighter to submit… You see that’s his style, thats how he wins all his fights. He likes to go for he submission and he landed himself a nice arm bar the third time.

In this fight, I am going to say that my heart/spirit was lacking. I just wasn’t firing off enough aggression. I seem to have soften up over he years but I don’t feel bad about it. I’ll just note is as something that is crucial to winning a match. SPIRIT!!!

Kudos Mateja

MJJ Tournament: Fight 2

Christien Paul — Mon, 21 Feb 2011 20:05:19 +0000

best fight in the tournament hands down. Historically, I lose my first fight because I’m nervous (about going too hard) and slow turn it up. By the 2nd fight I’m fully awake (these tournaments are early in the morning) and ready to rock. It’s the mind-set I had here… I visualized the win, I had my strategy and voila. I won both rounds without getting tired, without breaking a sweat.

AWESOME!

Note to Self

8 Types of Women you should know about

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